My heart has been riding on a roller coaster in the past month, no, actually, in the past few months since I witnessed Giants win Dodgers after a row of losses.
I've been having nights of insomnia because of excitements alternating with nights of insomnia because of disappointments. Confusion, delusion, expectation and suspicion one came after another to my hectic life. Being flattered, feeling hurt, abusing others and being abused all happened at the same time. After a while, I'm acting like one of those melancholy characters in Wong Kar-wai's movies.
I recently gave a talk on SLE about its up and down symptoms. I don't have SLE, why do I also have ups and downs drastically? Is it God's curse to all scientists who try to crack on Pandora's box? Or is it because I've been drinking too much coffee and tea to wash down my feverish heart?
No, no, my dear, it's not your fault; it's not Dr. W's fault. And I won't blame the Indian prophet nor Teacher Pan the Taiwanese fortune teller. It's just my vulnerable feelings, and this sensitive woman heart.
One of my favorite quote from a book is "Every road leads to Rome, it's just not the road you anticipated in the first place". I don't care if I can get to Rome, i only pray I can still walk after I get off the roller coaster.
This was posted in my MSN space on 2/20/2007.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment